The drumline has always had an attitude problem. Even when I was part of it, we were known to be...well...jerks, but we were extremely loyal to each other. The line is pretty much a family. You stay with the family...or you get disowned.
That's what happened to me and another girl, who we will call Angela. We decided that we wanted to do winterguard (guards competing during winter season), which is a HUGE no-no for the drumline, but we still did it. A lot of the people didn't care we were part of the guard. The girls on the line, of course, didn't mind one bit. A lot of my friends didn't care, either. They were happy that I was happy. But Allen...he is very persuasive, and he got to the rest of them before they had a chance.
Which I personally don't understand. At the start of winter season last year, the guard taught him how to do a butterfly, and he enjoyed it! Why so bipolar, Allen? Grr...
Anyways, my close friends didn't care that I joined guard. One of them, who, up until recently, was one of my very very close friends, was proud of the fact that I joined without caring what the line thought. Let's call him Zach. Zach and I were very good friends. I told him everything...I even loved him for the longest time...but, in the end, Allen got to him. Allen got to everyone.
I was officially disowned July 4th. The day no one, including Zach, came to my rescue when Allen ridiculed me worst than he ever had before.
I haven't spoken to any of them since...and it's hard, you know? The family I had for 3 years, gone. Within 10 seconds, they left. Left me for dead.
It's because of them I can't sleep tonight. Because of them, I feel lost at rehearsals.
It's because of you, Allen, that I dread even going to rehearsals.
I'm tired of getting hurt.
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